Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
