please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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