Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
A bitchslap is in order.
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