I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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