lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
