I molested 6 butterflies tonight
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
