Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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