I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize