I heard we made out
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Randomize
