I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Will you blow on my dice?
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
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