Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize
