Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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