Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Randomize
