Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Randomize
