Bisexual people are plain selfish.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
