No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
