Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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