shes about as inviting as chlamydia
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
