just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize