Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
