I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize