Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
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