Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
