I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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