That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
