I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
