that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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