The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
