Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
