My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
it's great music for shaving your balls
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
