the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
