I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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