please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Randomize
