problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
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