I must be too annoying 4 u.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize