I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
