I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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