Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
