lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
