Me. At least after what I've been through.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
