So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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