what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
We have started to decorate penises.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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