How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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