who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
