That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
