Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
