Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
