So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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