my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
