...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
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